Modern culture will always be adding new words to the English vocabulary; that I can accept. After all, our parents and grandparents had to get accustomed to hearing words and phrases like "swell," "rad," "awesome," "that's a gas," "what's your bag," "far out," "psyche" and a multitude of others.
However, with the rise of texting and text speak I'm afraid we're truly dumbing down the English language. Words are getting chopped up, mixed with numbers, sliced, and diced, all because some people
Because I rarely text, I'll admit that I'm out of the loop, a little square, and not hip (there's a few slang phrases for you) to what the kids today consider "cool" words. For example, a former coworker I'm connected to on Facebook recently vented her distaste for the use of the word "bae." (As I typed this just now, Blogger tried to auto correct first to the word "bar" then to the word "bad." Another inconvenient problem with making up nonsense words.)
I didn't even know bae meant so I looked it up. Don't these idiots using it know that bae is Danish for poop? I'm not kidding. It also sounds like the sound a sheep makes. However, bae in American slang language is short for baby, babe, sweetie, before anyone else, etc. It's a term of endearment! Really? Was typing and pronouncing that second "b" in "babe" that much of an effort? Have we really gotten this lazy?
So, without further ado, here's a list of other modern words and phrases that I really just can't stomach for various reasons. Whatever happened to cool and daddy-o, anyway?
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MILF/DILF/GILF/ETC.
They stand for a "mother I'd like to bleep," "dad I'd like to bleep" and "grandfather/grandmother I'd like to bleep." Gross. Only they're not saying the word bleep. I just find the whole acronym awkward to pronounce (like the speaker has a lisp) and its blunt meaning offensive. I've seen teenage girls openly post it on YouTube videos of Christoph Waltz. Hate to break it to you young "ladies" (ahem) but Christoph wouldn't be caught dead with anyone using such a silly crap word. Trust me, if you're classy, you won't use this ridiculous word.
Would you hit it?/I'd like to hit that/Mama gonna tap that
Another cheap, disgusting, offensive phrase referring to fornication that frankly, has always sounded a bit violent to me and really objectifies its human subject by referring to them as it or that. You're not supposed to want to "hit" the person you want to make love to. Really? I prefer Austin Powers' phrase of choice: shagadelic.
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YOLO
You only live once. So why not use proper English? Besides, us retro fans know that the acronym should really be YOLT - as in you only live twice. Thank you, Nancy Sinatra and 007.
Later, b*tches!
Growing up, the B word was one of the worst things you could call a woman...after the C word, that is. Or it meant complaining or a female dog. But now it's used like a term of endearment. What's wrong with simply saying, "See you later, ladies"?
It's supposed to describe something that is highly cool and relevant, but in my opinion you are the original meaning of this word if you use it.
Bros before hos
Referring to women as "hos" pretty much guarantees that you'll only be hanging with your bros.
Throwing some shade
I prefer my late father's old saying, "putting the whammy (evil eye) on someone."
Lemme
How much effort is required from the muscles in the human mouth to say "let me"? Rilly, is dis how laze we b'comin?
KK
It means OK. Who knew. Why not just say/text OK? Too lazy to locate the O button (that is right above the K?)
I leave you with that age old question that Paul Lynde and Dick Van Dyke pondered: what's the matter with kids today? Who can understand anything they say?
What about you? Are there any modern slang words and phrases that you can't stomach, or leave you scratching your head?
